Gulo

Gulong-gulo ako
Gulong-gulo sa'yo.
Ako mismo, hindi ko na alam ang gagawin
Kaya nga't sa Diyos nalang dumalangin.

Kasi yung totoo,
Kung hahayaan ko lang talaga 'to,
Tiyak ang lalabas na sagot ay oo.
Dahil ganito kalakas yung tama ko sa'yo.

Ang pangit pakinggan
Na ako pa babae ang natamaan.
Pero may magagawa pa nga ba ako?
Kahit anong pigil ko, balik ng balik pa din sa'yo.

Di mo siguro alam kung gaano ko pinigilan
Di mo siguro alam kung ilang beses ko sinubukan.
Pero ikaw naman kasi, ang gulo-gulo mo rin
Kung kailan na bibitiw na'ko, doon mo rin hihilain.

Tapos tsaka mo iiwan sa ere
Yung tipo bang parang walang nangyari?
Siguro nga hindi mo lang talaga alam
Kung anong gulong dulot mo sa'king nararamdaman.

Kung iisipin, kaya ko pa naman na ganito
Pero nakakapagod din kaya, ano.
Alam kong di mo naman ako pinapaasa
Ako lang naman itong naghahangad ng iba.

Kaya nga sinasabi ko na ayoko na
Tama na 'tong pabalik-balik ha?
Ayoko nang magkagusto sa taong walang gusto sa'kin
Masakit at ako'y naka-ilang beses na rin.

Nagdasal ako, nanalangin sa Diyos
Nagtanong, humingi ng huling pagtutuos.
Kasi maging ako ay hindi makaintindi
Kung bakit ang nararamdaman ko'y hindi maitimpi.

Yung sagot Niya ay itinali ko sa sagot mo
Ilang araw ko hinintay at iniyakan ito
Kasi gusto ko na talaga ng kaliwanagan
Kung hahayaan ko ba, o ika'y dapat nang kalimutan.

At ang naging sagot? Naalala mo pa ba?
Tinanong kita kung dadating ba ang araw na magmamahal ka.
Hindi man ganoon mismo yung pagkakatanong ko
Pero ganoon na rin yun kung lubos na iintindihin mo

Sinabi mo'y hindi ka gapos na pagdaanan ang ganoong estado
At iyon ay sagot na "hindi" sa pagkakaintindi ko
Kung kaya't doon di'y nagdesisyon ako
Na limutin na ang nararamdaman para sa'yo.

Pero binawi mo yung sagot mo sa mga kasunod mong sinabi
Bakit ganoon? Bakit ang gulo mo? Bakit mo pa binawi?
Okay na sana, natanggap ko na
Yung aking naging desisyon na kalimutan ka.

Pero kahit ganoon, binawi mo man o hindi
Nakapagdesisyon na akong maghunos dili
Ayoko na din kasi ibuhos ang lahat ng atensyon ko dito
Malay natin, balang araw, pero sa ngayon, bitiw na muna ako.

Kung ikaw man ang tunay na para sakin
Balang araw, diyan tayo ay aabot din
Pero sa ngayon, hangga't wala pang sigurado
Mas mabuting tapusin na muna natin itong gulo.

Translation:

I am confused

I am confused with you

I, myself, do not know anymore what I must do

That's why instead, I just pray to God

Because the truth is

If I just let this be

Then of course the answer would turn out to be yes

Because that is just how strong my feelings for you are

It doesn't even sound right

That I, a girl, am the one who feels this strongly

But is there anything I can do about it?

No matter what I do, I just keep on coming back to you

You probably don't know how hard I tried to stop it

You probably don't know how many times I tried

It's partly your fault as well, you are just so confusing

Whenever I'm about to let go, that's when you pull me right back.

And then you suddenly leave me in mid-air

In a way as if nothing just happened?

Maybe you really just don't know

What confusion you have caused to these feelings of mine

If you think about, I can actually still go on this way

But it's also tiring me out, you know.

I know that you're not really even making me hope in vain

It's just me all along who hopes for something more.

That's why I'm saying that I don't want to keep going on like this

Let's put a stop to this back-and-forth already, okay?

I wanna stop liking someone who has no feelings for me

It hurts, and I 've already done it once too many times

I prayed, I prayed hard to God

I asked and asked for a final guidance for this.

Because even I can't understand anymore

Why my feelings for you just cannot be reined.

I tied His answer to yours

For days, I waited and cried for this

Because I just really wanted clarity already

Whether I should let it go, or let this be.

And the answer? Do you still remember?

I asked you if there will ever be a time that you will love

I may not have asked the question exactly that way

But it would mean the same if you really think about it.

You said that you are not limited to go through that stage

And that means "no" in my own understanding of it

That's why, then and there, I decided

To finally forget my feelings for you.

But you took back your answer in the next things you said

Why? Why are you so confusing? Why did you take them back?

It was fine already, I've already accepted

The decision I made to forget my feelings for you.

But even so, whether you took them back or not

I've already decided to stop being foolish

Because I just wanted to stop focusing all my attention to this

We don't know, maybe someday it can still happen, but for now, I'm letting go.

If you are indeed the one for me,

One day, we will definitely get there too,

But for now, until nothing is for sure,

It's better to put a stop to this mess.